A Blessed Day of Calm

by irenedavid

Thursday afternoon through Friday morning was an incredibly painful stretch of time. My husband and I had one of the worst arguments we’ve had in a long time.  Sadly enough , it came after our marriage counseling session.

I don’t like feeling backed into a corner.  When I can’t get away from it, I rage.  I couldn’t get away from it on the 30 mile drive home, so I ended up screaming.  At least I didn’t wreck the car, although that thought did flash through my mind for a nano second.

My husband had his 12-step meeting when we got home, so there was no talking then.  I took drugs to make me sleep, but was still awake when he got home, but he didn’t want to talk then, and he didn’t want to talk before I left for work.

I left work early and he finally was willing to talk, but it was an uneasy truce.

Today, we have visited a new museum, and eaten out with some friends.  But we haven’t kissed today.  I think we are both a little wary of each other.

But it has been a calm day in what has been a weird week.  I’ll take calm anytime I can get it.  Oddly enough, our counselor felt like we were making good progress and was very encouraged about our marriage. But when a couple has been through our type of ordeal, the train can get derailed fairly easily.

Today has been a nice respite.  I’m about to see if I can get a kiss.