Dueling Therapists

by irenedavid

Yikes!  Yesterday I went to the psychiatric APN who manages my meds.  She asked me how I was doing; I told her I was depressed.  Then I mentioned that I had been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and the reaction I got caught me way off guard.  (This is someone I have spent about 90 minutes total with since September).  She jumped all over my diagnosis and wanted to know who my therapist was.  I told her and she wrote down his name. (They are not in the same city).

She said there was no way he could know I was a borderline in less than a year; that it was a horrible diagnosis to saddle someone with.  Then she said she thought I might have OCD or be bipolar, but BPD should take a lot longer to diagnose.

After I left there, I sent my therapist a text to tell him that I thought she might call him and I was just sending a heads-up.  From there, it went to emails, blah, blah, blah.

BTW, she asked me what his certification was and when I told her, she called him a glorified social worker.  Woah!

Psychiatrists and psychologists are a competitive lot.  I didn’t realize how much.  I think this may be one of the HUGE problems with therapy.  If you see therapist A, he/she may tell you one thing.  If you talk to therapist B, you may get a different story.  That’s why it’s really important to find a good therapist and stick with them for several months at least.

Yesterday was a “dang! calm down” kind of experience.  It rattled my cage a little.  I’m sure I’m borderline, not as much as I could be, but enough that it has affected my life and my family’s life to a certain degree.  There is too much that diagnosis makes me say, “Wow, that’s me,” for me to think it’s an incorrect diagnosis.

BTW, I feel like God has disappeared from my life again.  It makes me doubt my faith, even my conversion, because surely I should be more settled in my belief of who He is by now.

Pray for me.