Have I Overstepped my Bounds?
Today did not start well. I had bad dreams last night and those tend to hang on for a while after I awaken. My husband was not in a great mood, either. The “high” of singing in church had worn off and he was down and wondering what was next. (He still doesn’t have a job.)
I got home from work and “fussed” at God for a good bit. Now I feel guilty and like I’ve stepped over the line. It is difficult to maintain a positive attitude when life is upside-down, or at least sideways. Because of my disorder, I wrestle with believing God loves me unconditionally. Right now, I feel like my prayers are bouncing off a wall.
People tell me I have to have faith. Jesus is the author and perfecter of my faith, so He has to help me have faith, right? I don’t know how to manufacture more faith on my own.
I know I’ve said it numerous times before on this blog, but I’m so tired. God, are you listening, or have you grown tired of hearing the same prayers over and over?