I was praying today, asking God to forgive me for my struggle to believe He loves me unconditionally, when I suddenly realized that the root of the problem goes deeper than that. I’m scared of Him.
My therapist and I have worked through some of the lies my childhood told me about who God was and what I was. But not this issue…and it’s a biggy. I’m scared of God–always waiting for a punch in the stomach or a picture of an 0pen-mouthed shark in my bed.
Scared of God…what an oxymoron in light of this verse:
1 John 4:18
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.
If you’re reading this, please pray for me.